I read your post about tweens, and totally agreed. Here’s the thing, every time I say something about my tween’s behavior, some well-meaning “elder” pipes up with, “Oh just wait til he’s a teenager.” Seriously?? Most days I’m either biting my tongue to keep from cussing this kid out or reminding myself that I can’t punch him in the face. The last possible thing I need to hear is, “Oh well you ain’t seen nothing yet. ” Or, “The worst is yet to come.” What’s wrong with people? Do they think this is helpful?? How do you respond?
Hi honey, your post had me cracking UP. Amen, sister, A-MEN! It’s. So. Annoying!!! It’s like when you have a newborn and are surviving solely on caffeine and the grace of God, and someone says, “Awwww…you’re gonna miss this.”
Insert your favorite cuss words here.
My “baby” is 11. I promise you: I don’t miss sleepless nights. Or someone puking on me. Or diapers. Or drool. Or baby toys. Or carseats, sweet Jesus. Or a being that was fully helpless. I could go on indefinitely. I loved my babies. Enjoyed lots of things about them. Don’t miss it. When I see someone with a tiny baby, I want to say, “Awwww…you’re gonna survive this.”
I really don’t know what people’s intentions are or if they have any intentions at all. Comments like that are about as helpful as saying, “Been there done that.” But let’s give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe their kids are grown and they’d give anything for another opportunity to argue with them as tweens. Maybe they just really want to encourage you that this too will pass. It’s kind of a stretch, I know.
And teenagers get a bad rap. Personally, I like them. You can have really interesting conversations with them. And they can show you how everything on your phone works. Tweens can be cool too, but exercise caution as they’re about as unpredictable as feral cats.
My kids are 23, 17, and 11, so when someone gives me advice about my little tween, I smile and nod because I know what it’s like to raise teenagers. Been there done that.
And that is mostly how I respond to unsolicited advice and stupid comments: Smile. Sometimes nod. And occasionally just stare blankly at them when I can’t muster a smile. This makes people uncomfortable by the way…when you sit and quietly hold space for the stupidity.
Hang in there, mama. Tweens can be demonic, but thankfully, it IS just a phase. Personally, I think teens are way way better. But in the meantime, I remind myself that this awkward phase is like being in a constant state of PMS–for boys and girls because: H O R M O N E S. It helps me to empathize…and to not punch her in the face.